Three days late. Ooops. Everything kinda fell apart on me this week.
Also yeah, you read that title right. It's not really an exaggeration, fanfiction nearly did get me killed this week. Granted, it was technically my fault, but I'm still gonna blame fanfiction.
So I was out walking, and I usually use that time to daydream about my stories and potential future ideas. This time was no different. I was concentrating on ideas for Immortal Bond when I was about to cross a road. Now, I'm not a complete idiot, I did look before I crossed the road, and I swear down that there were no cars coming when I looked. So I carry on daydreaming as I began crossing the road when all of a sudden a car comes to a stop right next me, blocked by me crossing the road. Being in daydream mode, I weirdly didn't register what was happening and just carried on slowly walking in front of it. Uhhh, I'm so awkward and weird. The driver must have been so confused and angry that this girl looked before crossing and then just crossed anyway despite them driving down the road towards me, and then just carried on walking normally, as if the girl just hadn't nearly been run over.
It wasn't until I got to the other side of the road that I finally registered what had just happened and the car drove off. They never beeped their horn at me which I thought was strange, seen as I had literally just stepped out in front of their car and they could have run me over. I was super confused and felt really bad that I had probably really angered or terrified this person.
But it was so weird. Like I said, I did look before I crossed the road, and I could have sworn that there were no cars coming. The road was completely empty and deserted. Unless...it was a ghost car! Maybe that's the only logical explanation!
Nah, it was probably down to my own stupidity and not registering that there was in fact a car driving towards me. I was probably concentrating so hard on my ideas that I probably wasn't paying attention as much as I thought I was. So yeah, fanfiction nearly killed me. I nearly got run over because of it.
On the whole, I haven't been having much luck this week. I've been feeling a bit...all over the place. I feel like how I felt just before I had a mental breakdown a few years ago and it's worrying me slightly. Everything just feels...odd. Like I'm a jigsaw piece that hasn't quite been inserted into the right place in the realm of reality. It's a strange, hard to describe feeling. It's been leaving me freaked out, jumpy and paranoid. I keep spacing out and getting confused.
Which is really weird because earlier this week, I was feeling completely fine. In fact, I was feeling better than I had felt in a long time. But of course I should have known that was a sign that I was going to crash soon. Wednesday and Thursday were the worst days. I have no clue what happened, but all of a sudden on Wednesday I just lost it. I would burst into tears over the most random, insignificant things, I couldn't hold down a conversation, I was constantly losing my temper and uhhh, it was rough. I don't think it helped that I was really tired. I haven't been sleeping properly these past couple of nights.
Thursday didn't get off to a good start and I was still feeling as awful as I was the day before. I couldn't get to sleep that night, and when I did sleep, I slept so deeply that I just didn't feel well rested. I woke up feeling like a zombie and I was extremely grumpy. My foul mood was made worse by my neighbours. Now, I have...very interesting neighbours. They're all annoying in their own unique way and it's awful how closely houses are often squashed together in the UK, so I live in a very tightly compacted neighbourhood.
At the moment, my most annoying neighbour award goes to two households. Both of which own yappy dogs that they just...will...not...shut...up. Like, seriously, if you're gonna get a dog, at least be responsible and look after it and make sure it, oh I dunno, doesn't annoy the neighbours. I love dogs, but my goodness, these ones drive me mad. They will literally bark none stop for hours on end and the owners just let them. I have a dog, and I know if she started barking none stop, I would shut her up, because it would start to annoy me, so how they don't get annoyed by their dog barking none stop, I have no idea. Is it laziness? Lack of knowledge on how to control a dog? Because if it's either of those reasons, then the answer is simple: don't get a dog. I hate people who get pets and then don't face up to the responsibility. Pets can't be cute five minute wonders. They're companions for the rest of their lives; they need you. Step up and help them learn boundaries.
Anyway, I'll stop ranting now. That's just been something that has been really bugging me this week.
So the none stop barking definitely didn't help my fowl mood. It was like each high-pitched bark slowly chipped away at my sanity. My eyes were also hurting a lot from my lack of decent sleep and from staring at bright screens all day. My knees and back were also cramping from all the exercise I've been trying to do lately, because I'm stupid and always forget to warm up and cool down properly. Sorry LycoRogue, I know you did try to warn me. So yeah, that one was my fault.
But luckily, my mood did start to slowly improve throughout the day, mainly aided by me taking some time to draw and paint, and also because of how awesome the weather has been where I live lately. It's been all cold, dark and foggy which I always love. It always really helps me with inspiration and I find that kind of weather really peaceful. It's weather that helps me reflect and think. I think what also kept helping to lift my mood was that an old friend of mine got back in touch with me after years of not being able to talk to each other. It was so great to hear from her again, and it was like we had never been apart.
I also finally found the courage to post some of my work on AO3 this week. I was super scared about doing so because I had no idea how the site worked, I was terrified of doing something wrong, and I was worried that people wouldn't find my ideas interesting or would hate them. I decided that I would post Secret Shipper first, seen as it was a one-shot and it would hopefully help me get a good grasp of how the site worked. Shout out to LycoRogue for all her advice though. Without her, I probably would have been completely clueless.
Luckily, I managed to post the story without breaking anything or embarrassing myself (I hope anyway), so yeah, Secret Shipper is now available to read on my AO3 account. You can also access my profile on AO3 by clicking here, or you can click the link on the sidebar where all of my other accounts are located.
I couldn't believe it when Secret Shipper actually started getting responses. It filled me with confidence that I could work things on that site. It took a lot of fiddling, but I finally got a handle on things (that's what she said). A few glitches occurred, but that's to be expected when I'm messing about with something new. Luckily, I'm a fast learner, so it didn't take me long to fix things and make sure that I didn't accidentally post a huge mess of text that made no sense.
Once I was sure I was doing things correctly, I decided to post the first chapter of Madness Within onto the site, which you can access by clicking here. It seems to be getting quite a good response so far which is promising. Everyone who commented seems to like it and is curious about the story. So I guess I'll just see how that goes. Fingers crossed that people will continue to like it.
Speaking of Madness Within, the latest chapter gave me a hell of a lot of trouble this week. I was hoping to get it up for Friday just like the last one was, but it was like the universe began conspiring against me. As you already know, I haven't been sleeping well or feeling good mentally this week, so that made concentrating on writing the chapter extra difficult. My creativity just didn't seem to be flowing at all. Then I actually started to get physically ill on top of feeling mentally crap.
However, I still did manage to get a good chunk of the chapter written on Friday. What really killed it that day was how I got distracted by my other story ideas. I finally came up with a name for the fantasy/medieval AU story that I have planned: A Cursed Blessing. I have no clue why it took me so long to come up with a title. Well...actually my boyfriend came up with it. I'm so bad at titles and names. I originally came up with 'Curse of the Kwamis', but then I thought that sounded too much like a B rated horror movie or something, and just sounded silly. So my boyfriend and I started brainstorming ideas and that's when he suggested A Cursed Blessing and I knew that was the title I was finally going to go with.
Then we started brainstorming ideas for Immortal Bond together. We managed to fix a few of the plot holes that were really frustrating me and managed to flesh out the world a little bit. However, in order for all of that to work, the story had to get more complicated. I just hope that I haven't over-complicated things and that people won't be put off by this. But I do quite like the ideas that we managed to come up with, and I'm so relieved now that some of those damn plot holes have been fixed. I'm definitely excited to begin writing this story once again. There's still other aspects that I need to fix, but right now I'm aiming to start writing again at some point during late December or early January.
Before we both knew it, it had gotten late and I realised I had just totally abandoned the latest chapter of Madness Within. But hey, at least I wasn't completely slacking off, I still managed to get some other writing related work done. I mean, there was always all day Saturday that I could get the chapter done.
Right?
Well as you can see, that didn't quite work out.
I realised that I needed to get some shopping done which ate into some of my time, but I'm usually a fast shopper. I don't like to hang around and prefer to just get my stuff and go. However, I ended up seeing someone there I really don't like, and I didn't want them to see me. The situation is difficult to explain without going too much into my personal life. I know this is hard to believe and sounds like I'm just saying it (especially seen as I've given you no context), but this person did literally go up to that store knowing that I would be there (I have a very predictable routine). They wanted to get a reaction out of me. So I had to hide in the store until they left, preying that they wouldn't see me and start harassing me.
So yeah, I ended up hiding for ages while they did their shopping and hung around waiting for me to appear. Luckily they gave up in the end and left. I have no idea what the people monitoring the CCTV thought of me. I'm surprised they didn't think I was up to no good with all the ducking, diving and looking around I did. There's never a dull moment when I decide to venture outside.
This meant I ended up being at the store longer than I normally would be, which once again, ate into my writing time. But again, I thought it wouldn't be a problem, I already had most of the chapter written.
However, as soon as I sat down to write, my brain just completely crashed. It refused to work. I tried to force myself to write and managed to pump out another few thousand words for the chapter, but it was an uphill struggle. I don't think it helps that I really wasn't looking forward to writing this chapter. I'm sure my fellow writers out there will understand that sometimes there are chapters that you have to write, but don't want to write. I have no interest in this chapter at all. I have no clue why. But it's needed for the story, so I have no choice but to write it. It's probably also because there's a lot of fighting and action in this chapter, and I hate writing all that stuff. It never comes out as well as it looks in my head.
I don't think I have ever been so slow at writing a chapter in my life. In the end, I just ended up staring at my laptop screen, begging my brain to work. But it wouldn't. It had come to a complete halt. I was literally so close to the end of the chapter as well, and that's what made it all the more frustrating. I was just getting to the action scenes, however, my brain just could not get the words out. I got super worried and thought that the chapter was awful.
In the end, I decided it would be best just to come back fresh to it the next day. It was obvious that my brain had decided to stop working for the day and the words were just not coming out at all. I realised there was no use in forcing myself because I just wasn't getting anywhere. The chapter was already terrible in quality as it was, I didn't want to make it any worse. So yeah, the release of chapter twenty-two of Madness Within was delayed until yesterday. However, it is now up, and you can read it by clicking here.
As soon as the reviews came in, I was super relieved. Everyone seemed to enjoy the chapter, despite how much I worried that it wasn't that good. I guess I was just being overly insecure again. But that's the story of my life. Though one thing has made me laugh about the chapter. Because I had to split the chapter in half, I joked in my author's note that the story would end up being one hundred chapters long at this point. And a few people seem to have taken that seriously. I've had a few people telling me it doesn't matter and few people telling me that amount of chapters is a bit much.
Guys, it was a joke. Don't panic.
Writing a fic that was a hundred chapters long would drive me crazy. Because yeah, I do think that is a bit much. But at the rate I'm having to split chapters, this story could be anywhere between forty to sixty chapters long. Sixty is probably the most extreme case scenario...I hope anyway. But we are around the halfway point in the story.
Also, guess what?! I finally watched the season two finale of Miraculous Ladybug! Yaaaay! After so much time waiting and waiting and waiting, and trying to dodge spoilers, I was finally able to watch it! And I was not disappointed! It was so amazing! You can really tell that the creators went all out with it. So yeah, that means that I am also active on Tumblr again now. I would block tags (once I figure out how to do it), but there's still the risk of people not tagging spoilers, as this is indeed something I've seen happen. Tag your spoilers people, it's unfair to others if you don't. I always make sure to tag mine, but just in case you don't know how to block tags, don't go on my Tumblr blog until you've caught up.
Of course, now we have the introduction of season three. I was so looking forward to not have to worry about tagging spoilers all of the time once the show gets released in America. But noooo, season three has now been dropped on us quite literally out of nowhere. Not that I'm really complaining, it's great that we're getting season three so soon after season two. I'm super excited! I just wish the show was distributed better and more fairly as it's all over the place. The show is so popular at this point that you'd honestly think they would start airing it worldwide simultaneously so people wouldn't have to avoid spoilers. But I suppose that would be difficult seen as different channels run it in different countries. Which is a shame.
As for whether I'll be doing reviews of the finale episodes, well, honestly, I have no idea. At the moment it's looking likely that I won't be doing a review. I've just got too much on my plate at the moment and I really came to hate writing episode reviews. I have no clue why. But my review of the episodes can definitely be summed up by one word: awesome.
Once again, I'm sorry that this blog post was three days late. My time management just went all over the place thanks to everything that was going on. But there will still be another Chronicle this coming Friday. I have no idea when I'll be working on my next Miraculous Ladybug specific blog post. I have a list of ideas of stuff to talk about, but it's just finding the time at the moment as it's taken a back seat to everything else. But here's hoping I can sort something out.
Pixie out.
Also yeah, you read that title right. It's not really an exaggeration, fanfiction nearly did get me killed this week. Granted, it was technically my fault, but I'm still gonna blame fanfiction.
So I was out walking, and I usually use that time to daydream about my stories and potential future ideas. This time was no different. I was concentrating on ideas for Immortal Bond when I was about to cross a road. Now, I'm not a complete idiot, I did look before I crossed the road, and I swear down that there were no cars coming when I looked. So I carry on daydreaming as I began crossing the road when all of a sudden a car comes to a stop right next me, blocked by me crossing the road. Being in daydream mode, I weirdly didn't register what was happening and just carried on slowly walking in front of it. Uhhh, I'm so awkward and weird. The driver must have been so confused and angry that this girl looked before crossing and then just crossed anyway despite them driving down the road towards me, and then just carried on walking normally, as if the girl just hadn't nearly been run over.
It wasn't until I got to the other side of the road that I finally registered what had just happened and the car drove off. They never beeped their horn at me which I thought was strange, seen as I had literally just stepped out in front of their car and they could have run me over. I was super confused and felt really bad that I had probably really angered or terrified this person.
But it was so weird. Like I said, I did look before I crossed the road, and I could have sworn that there were no cars coming. The road was completely empty and deserted. Unless...it was a ghost car! Maybe that's the only logical explanation!
Nah, it was probably down to my own stupidity and not registering that there was in fact a car driving towards me. I was probably concentrating so hard on my ideas that I probably wasn't paying attention as much as I thought I was. So yeah, fanfiction nearly killed me. I nearly got run over because of it.
On the whole, I haven't been having much luck this week. I've been feeling a bit...all over the place. I feel like how I felt just before I had a mental breakdown a few years ago and it's worrying me slightly. Everything just feels...odd. Like I'm a jigsaw piece that hasn't quite been inserted into the right place in the realm of reality. It's a strange, hard to describe feeling. It's been leaving me freaked out, jumpy and paranoid. I keep spacing out and getting confused.
Which is really weird because earlier this week, I was feeling completely fine. In fact, I was feeling better than I had felt in a long time. But of course I should have known that was a sign that I was going to crash soon. Wednesday and Thursday were the worst days. I have no clue what happened, but all of a sudden on Wednesday I just lost it. I would burst into tears over the most random, insignificant things, I couldn't hold down a conversation, I was constantly losing my temper and uhhh, it was rough. I don't think it helped that I was really tired. I haven't been sleeping properly these past couple of nights.
Thursday didn't get off to a good start and I was still feeling as awful as I was the day before. I couldn't get to sleep that night, and when I did sleep, I slept so deeply that I just didn't feel well rested. I woke up feeling like a zombie and I was extremely grumpy. My foul mood was made worse by my neighbours. Now, I have...very interesting neighbours. They're all annoying in their own unique way and it's awful how closely houses are often squashed together in the UK, so I live in a very tightly compacted neighbourhood.
At the moment, my most annoying neighbour award goes to two households. Both of which own yappy dogs that they just...will...not...shut...up. Like, seriously, if you're gonna get a dog, at least be responsible and look after it and make sure it, oh I dunno, doesn't annoy the neighbours. I love dogs, but my goodness, these ones drive me mad. They will literally bark none stop for hours on end and the owners just let them. I have a dog, and I know if she started barking none stop, I would shut her up, because it would start to annoy me, so how they don't get annoyed by their dog barking none stop, I have no idea. Is it laziness? Lack of knowledge on how to control a dog? Because if it's either of those reasons, then the answer is simple: don't get a dog. I hate people who get pets and then don't face up to the responsibility. Pets can't be cute five minute wonders. They're companions for the rest of their lives; they need you. Step up and help them learn boundaries.
Anyway, I'll stop ranting now. That's just been something that has been really bugging me this week.
 |
| I would like to take this opportunity to show off my gorgeous dog. |
So the none stop barking definitely didn't help my fowl mood. It was like each high-pitched bark slowly chipped away at my sanity. My eyes were also hurting a lot from my lack of decent sleep and from staring at bright screens all day. My knees and back were also cramping from all the exercise I've been trying to do lately, because I'm stupid and always forget to warm up and cool down properly. Sorry LycoRogue, I know you did try to warn me. So yeah, that one was my fault.
But luckily, my mood did start to slowly improve throughout the day, mainly aided by me taking some time to draw and paint, and also because of how awesome the weather has been where I live lately. It's been all cold, dark and foggy which I always love. It always really helps me with inspiration and I find that kind of weather really peaceful. It's weather that helps me reflect and think. I think what also kept helping to lift my mood was that an old friend of mine got back in touch with me after years of not being able to talk to each other. It was so great to hear from her again, and it was like we had never been apart.
I also finally found the courage to post some of my work on AO3 this week. I was super scared about doing so because I had no idea how the site worked, I was terrified of doing something wrong, and I was worried that people wouldn't find my ideas interesting or would hate them. I decided that I would post Secret Shipper first, seen as it was a one-shot and it would hopefully help me get a good grasp of how the site worked. Shout out to LycoRogue for all her advice though. Without her, I probably would have been completely clueless.
Luckily, I managed to post the story without breaking anything or embarrassing myself (I hope anyway), so yeah, Secret Shipper is now available to read on my AO3 account. You can also access my profile on AO3 by clicking here, or you can click the link on the sidebar where all of my other accounts are located.
I couldn't believe it when Secret Shipper actually started getting responses. It filled me with confidence that I could work things on that site. It took a lot of fiddling, but I finally got a handle on things (that's what she said). A few glitches occurred, but that's to be expected when I'm messing about with something new. Luckily, I'm a fast learner, so it didn't take me long to fix things and make sure that I didn't accidentally post a huge mess of text that made no sense.
Once I was sure I was doing things correctly, I decided to post the first chapter of Madness Within onto the site, which you can access by clicking here. It seems to be getting quite a good response so far which is promising. Everyone who commented seems to like it and is curious about the story. So I guess I'll just see how that goes. Fingers crossed that people will continue to like it.
Speaking of Madness Within, the latest chapter gave me a hell of a lot of trouble this week. I was hoping to get it up for Friday just like the last one was, but it was like the universe began conspiring against me. As you already know, I haven't been sleeping well or feeling good mentally this week, so that made concentrating on writing the chapter extra difficult. My creativity just didn't seem to be flowing at all. Then I actually started to get physically ill on top of feeling mentally crap.
However, I still did manage to get a good chunk of the chapter written on Friday. What really killed it that day was how I got distracted by my other story ideas. I finally came up with a name for the fantasy/medieval AU story that I have planned: A Cursed Blessing. I have no clue why it took me so long to come up with a title. Well...actually my boyfriend came up with it. I'm so bad at titles and names. I originally came up with 'Curse of the Kwamis', but then I thought that sounded too much like a B rated horror movie or something, and just sounded silly. So my boyfriend and I started brainstorming ideas and that's when he suggested A Cursed Blessing and I knew that was the title I was finally going to go with.
Then we started brainstorming ideas for Immortal Bond together. We managed to fix a few of the plot holes that were really frustrating me and managed to flesh out the world a little bit. However, in order for all of that to work, the story had to get more complicated. I just hope that I haven't over-complicated things and that people won't be put off by this. But I do quite like the ideas that we managed to come up with, and I'm so relieved now that some of those damn plot holes have been fixed. I'm definitely excited to begin writing this story once again. There's still other aspects that I need to fix, but right now I'm aiming to start writing again at some point during late December or early January.
Before we both knew it, it had gotten late and I realised I had just totally abandoned the latest chapter of Madness Within. But hey, at least I wasn't completely slacking off, I still managed to get some other writing related work done. I mean, there was always all day Saturday that I could get the chapter done.
Right?
Well as you can see, that didn't quite work out.
I realised that I needed to get some shopping done which ate into some of my time, but I'm usually a fast shopper. I don't like to hang around and prefer to just get my stuff and go. However, I ended up seeing someone there I really don't like, and I didn't want them to see me. The situation is difficult to explain without going too much into my personal life. I know this is hard to believe and sounds like I'm just saying it (especially seen as I've given you no context), but this person did literally go up to that store knowing that I would be there (I have a very predictable routine). They wanted to get a reaction out of me. So I had to hide in the store until they left, preying that they wouldn't see me and start harassing me.
So yeah, I ended up hiding for ages while they did their shopping and hung around waiting for me to appear. Luckily they gave up in the end and left. I have no idea what the people monitoring the CCTV thought of me. I'm surprised they didn't think I was up to no good with all the ducking, diving and looking around I did. There's never a dull moment when I decide to venture outside.
This meant I ended up being at the store longer than I normally would be, which once again, ate into my writing time. But again, I thought it wouldn't be a problem, I already had most of the chapter written.
However, as soon as I sat down to write, my brain just completely crashed. It refused to work. I tried to force myself to write and managed to pump out another few thousand words for the chapter, but it was an uphill struggle. I don't think it helps that I really wasn't looking forward to writing this chapter. I'm sure my fellow writers out there will understand that sometimes there are chapters that you have to write, but don't want to write. I have no interest in this chapter at all. I have no clue why. But it's needed for the story, so I have no choice but to write it. It's probably also because there's a lot of fighting and action in this chapter, and I hate writing all that stuff. It never comes out as well as it looks in my head.
I don't think I have ever been so slow at writing a chapter in my life. In the end, I just ended up staring at my laptop screen, begging my brain to work. But it wouldn't. It had come to a complete halt. I was literally so close to the end of the chapter as well, and that's what made it all the more frustrating. I was just getting to the action scenes, however, my brain just could not get the words out. I got super worried and thought that the chapter was awful.
In the end, I decided it would be best just to come back fresh to it the next day. It was obvious that my brain had decided to stop working for the day and the words were just not coming out at all. I realised there was no use in forcing myself because I just wasn't getting anywhere. The chapter was already terrible in quality as it was, I didn't want to make it any worse. So yeah, the release of chapter twenty-two of Madness Within was delayed until yesterday. However, it is now up, and you can read it by clicking here.
As soon as the reviews came in, I was super relieved. Everyone seemed to enjoy the chapter, despite how much I worried that it wasn't that good. I guess I was just being overly insecure again. But that's the story of my life. Though one thing has made me laugh about the chapter. Because I had to split the chapter in half, I joked in my author's note that the story would end up being one hundred chapters long at this point. And a few people seem to have taken that seriously. I've had a few people telling me it doesn't matter and few people telling me that amount of chapters is a bit much.
Guys, it was a joke. Don't panic.
Writing a fic that was a hundred chapters long would drive me crazy. Because yeah, I do think that is a bit much. But at the rate I'm having to split chapters, this story could be anywhere between forty to sixty chapters long. Sixty is probably the most extreme case scenario...I hope anyway. But we are around the halfway point in the story.
Also, guess what?! I finally watched the season two finale of Miraculous Ladybug! Yaaaay! After so much time waiting and waiting and waiting, and trying to dodge spoilers, I was finally able to watch it! And I was not disappointed! It was so amazing! You can really tell that the creators went all out with it. So yeah, that means that I am also active on Tumblr again now. I would block tags (once I figure out how to do it), but there's still the risk of people not tagging spoilers, as this is indeed something I've seen happen. Tag your spoilers people, it's unfair to others if you don't. I always make sure to tag mine, but just in case you don't know how to block tags, don't go on my Tumblr blog until you've caught up.
Of course, now we have the introduction of season three. I was so looking forward to not have to worry about tagging spoilers all of the time once the show gets released in America. But noooo, season three has now been dropped on us quite literally out of nowhere. Not that I'm really complaining, it's great that we're getting season three so soon after season two. I'm super excited! I just wish the show was distributed better and more fairly as it's all over the place. The show is so popular at this point that you'd honestly think they would start airing it worldwide simultaneously so people wouldn't have to avoid spoilers. But I suppose that would be difficult seen as different channels run it in different countries. Which is a shame.
As for whether I'll be doing reviews of the finale episodes, well, honestly, I have no idea. At the moment it's looking likely that I won't be doing a review. I've just got too much on my plate at the moment and I really came to hate writing episode reviews. I have no clue why. But my review of the episodes can definitely be summed up by one word: awesome.
Once again, I'm sorry that this blog post was three days late. My time management just went all over the place thanks to everything that was going on. But there will still be another Chronicle this coming Friday. I have no idea when I'll be working on my next Miraculous Ladybug specific blog post. I have a list of ideas of stuff to talk about, but it's just finding the time at the moment as it's taken a back seat to everything else. But here's hoping I can sort something out.
Pixie out.
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